Misspend parenthood

More controversy this month with the release of Government plans for an Anti Social Behaviour Bill. This would make mams and dads more responsible for badly behaved truant offspring. In extreme cases, offenders will be forced to attend parenting courses for weeks at a time.

The whole idea originated in Scandinavia, where the results were less than successful - with widespread bunking, disruption of classes and smoking behind the bike sheds. Parents even resorted to forging sick-notes from their parents to avoid attendance.

There's no answer to that one

A computerized image of the new Welsh Assembly building

Meanwhile, a Talk Wales' contibutor questioned First Minister Rhodri Morgan as he hit the campaign trail in the Valleys. Mr Morgan was asked for his opinion on the Iraq war. His reply was that he didn't have an opinion on the matter.

We asked Welsh philosopher (and drunk), Professor Philip Hayden-Jones, whether expressing a lack of an opinion actually constituted an opinion in itself. He replied that it was an unanswerable paradox, deeply woven into the psyche of existential reality - before collapsing in a drunken stupor.

 

Bulgarian Swans

A carousel

Heading further west, large numbers of Bulgarian women are being smuggled into Swansea.

At the local airport, customs officials swooped on a suspicious looking traveller who was struggling to lift a large holdall from a luggage carousel.

Inside the bag they discovered: a bottle of vodka, a carton of fags and a petite woman wearing a Stoitchcov shirt.

As the current customs allowance is a litre of spirits, two hundred cigarettes and two women from non-E.U. countries, he escaped prosecution.

In a separate incident, a number of foreign nationals were detained after a police raid on the newly opened Sofia's nightclub in the city.

Naked ambition

A tasteful arty-type photo of a nude person on the beach

Finally, plans are afoot to build a top-notch naturist resort in The Welsh Riviera.

The scheme is the brainchild of former 'Valley's boy made-good' Jeremy Hughes, who now resides in the Bahamas. Mr Hughes believes the Scheme could bring hundreds of jobs and millions of pounds into the area, and is confident of getting the necessary bums on towels.

Dissenters will have their say, as any new erections are liable to planning permission. Talk Wales as ever, will do its level best to keep you abreast of any future developments.